Cutesy hairdresser names
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I've heard it said that among the retail establishments most addicted to cutesy punning business names are hairdressing salons. I mean, you don't find law practices called Law 'n' Order to Go, do you? Or a hardware store called Get Hard? Or a butcher's called Meat and Greet? But with hairdressers… Well, I don't know all that many myself; just about 150 or so that I've personally seen the signs for…
A Cut Above
A Hair A Head
About an Inch
Affair with Hair
AHead of Time
And Hair We Are
Barber of Neville
Barber-o
Ben Hair
Blonde Ambition
Book A Head for Hair
British Hairways
Cissor's Palace
Coifforium
Coiffurama
Combing Attractions
Come Hair
Comb One Comb All
Crops & Bobbers
Cunning Cuts
Curl Up and Dye
Cut Becks
Cut Busser
Cut Loose
Cut 'n' Crew
Cut Out
Cut Throat
Cut's 2 a T
Cuts Both Ways
Cuts 'N Stuff
Cutting It
Cutting Loose
Cutting Remarks
Debonhair
Den 'n' Hair
Devastating Doo's
Do or Dye
E-clips
Etticut Hair
Fred's Heads
Fringe Benefits
Frizz Bizz
From Head to Toe
Ginger Snips
Go Ahead
Grateful Head
Great Clips
Great Head
Hair 4 U
Hair After
Hair Apparent
Hair by the Sea
Hair Fair
Hair Fidelity
Hair Flick
Hair I Am
Hair It Is
Hair of the Dog
Hair Pleasure
Hair Reaction
Hair-2-e-Tan-ity
Hairborn Stylists
Hairgott
Hairitage
Hairline
Hairloom
Hair-o-Dynamics
Hairport
Hair's Looking at You
Hairs 'N His
Hair's To You!
Hair's What's Happening
Hairvens Above
Hairvolution
Hairway to Heaven
Hairz God's Gift
Hard As Nailz
Hare Styles
Head Bangers
Head First
Head Games
Head Hunter
Head Office
Head Shoppe
Headcase
Headlines
Headmasters
Headonizm
Headquarterz
Heads Up
Headtalk
His & Her Cutz
Hot Head
It's a Curl Thing
It's All Hair
Jack the Clipper
Julius Scissor
Killin Kutz
Kutting Crew
L'Hair du Temps
Locks of Fun
Loose Ends
Mane Advocates
Mane Attraction
Max Headroom
Medusa
Millionhairs
Nut-Hoose
Oh My Cut!
Peroximity
Posh by Beck's
Prime Cut
Razor's Edge
Scissor Sisters
Scissors of Ahhhz
Scizzors
Sebastian's Hair-em
Sharpest Image
Shear Animal
Shear Bliss
Shear Delight
Shear Excitement
Shear Royalty
Shear-n-Dipity
Sheerlock Combs
Shortcutz
Shylox
SlopeSuds
Snip and Sip
Still Cuttin' Up
Sunny & Shears
Talking Heads
THairapy Salon
The Best Little Hair House
The Chop House
The Chopping Block
The Clip Joint
The Cutting Room
The Godbarber
The Hairformers
The Hairs End
The Head Shed
The Last Tangle
The Surgeon of Fades
U Need It Bad
Up Hair
Upper Cut
Urban Roots
Wak-N-Yak
Wavelengths
We Are Hair!
Who Cuts Your Hair
Yer Head's Cut
Zizzors
But since I was able to find only these few (I know it's not much of a list, though it does run from A to Z), I wondered… if Language Log readers might know of any more?
Alessandra Zarcone said,
July 21, 2016 @ 2:58 pm
There is a whole German blog about this. Germans seem to love their hair salon puns!
Here it is:
https://barbierblog.wordpress.com/
Ron said,
July 21, 2016 @ 3:01 pm
Budget Cuts
Dick Margulis said,
July 21, 2016 @ 3:09 pm
Hair Plane
From Hair to Eternity
Hair Today
glen said,
July 21, 2016 @ 3:21 pm
Best one I ever saw was called: Half Potato
Noel Weer said,
July 21, 2016 @ 3:23 pm
Hair We Are
cM said,
July 21, 2016 @ 3:28 pm
This seems to be an international phenomenon.
Germany has
– Haarmonie
– Haarakiri
– Haarem
– Sahaara
– etc.
And those are only those I got without thinking about it too much – the ones not immediately understandable to an anglophone audience ("Hairvorragend") already removed.
France has:
– faudra tif hair
– Coloc at Hair
– Crini'hair
– Diminu'tif
And a multipunny classic of the genre:
Salah Mèche
Jake said,
July 21, 2016 @ 3:31 pm
The Simpsons has the fourth-wall-breaking "Hairy Shearers"
Joecab said,
July 21, 2016 @ 3:39 pm
As far as fictional ones go, nothing beats the Simpsons' "Turn Your Head and Coif."
Guy said,
July 21, 2016 @ 3:56 pm
I've noticed that optometrists have a tendency to incorporate puns into their names, though probably to a lesser extent. Looking at a list of optometrists near me to see if my impression pans out against the data I found a decent fraction of puns, though more "matter of fact" names. I think my favorite was "Eye Carumba Optometry".
Jerry Clough said,
July 21, 2016 @ 4:05 pm
Fish & Chip shops seem to show a similar dedication to punning names. A couple of local examples:
* The Cod's Scallops
* The Codfather (& associated The Codmother)
A quick look through OpenStreetMap's several thousand hairdresser names in the UK (e.g., http://overpass-turbo.eu/s/hqV) shows most are rather mundane (Amanda's, Antonio's, Audrey's etc), but I did find:
* Barberfella
* Barber Queue
which I rather like.
Pflaumbaum said,
July 21, 2016 @ 4:16 pm
There's a hairdresser in West London called 'Pure Barberism'
Q. Pheevr said,
July 21, 2016 @ 4:18 pm
One of the characters in Djanet Sears's play Harlem Duet expresses an aspiration to open a salon called "The Lock Smiths."
Bob Ladd said,
July 21, 2016 @ 4:38 pm
Since @cM brought up the internationalisation of cutesy names:
I just checked a long listing of hairdressers in Milan. VERY few cutesy names (Mani di Forbici 'Scissorhands') being one of them), but dozens whose names are English phrases of varying degrees of meaningfulness (Back Stage, Fashion Line, Free Time, Woman Paradise, Soft Touch, Family Affairs, etc. etc.). In Italian it's extremely cool to use English for commercial purposes, and this may fill some of the same functions of being cutesy in English. (There's also a considerable number of French names.)
Classicists may be interested to know that one of the places in the listing is called Stylus Suavis, which I think is supposed to be Latin but was presumably not intended to make reference to writing implements.
Phil said,
July 21, 2016 @ 4:55 pm
Beyond the Fringe, in Brighton
Roscoe said,
July 21, 2016 @ 5:25 pm
@Jake & Joecab – don't forget "The Perm Bank."
Jonathon Owen said,
July 21, 2016 @ 5:35 pm
This isn't one I've encountered, but if I were a hairdresser, I'd have a salon for introverts called Quiet Cuts. Our tagline would be "We cut the hair and the chit-chat."
Elizabeth Bennett said,
July 21, 2016 @ 5:44 pm
My locks, when overly long, are trimmed, by Jane, at Jane Hair.
Carl said,
July 21, 2016 @ 5:48 pm
There is an English language blog for this!
http://hairswhatwedo.com
Please submit any new ones you find to the blog.
Coby Lubliner said,
July 21, 2016 @ 5:57 pm
In Berkeley there's a place called Hair Professor.
Will said,
July 21, 2016 @ 6:00 pm
In Dalston, 'It will grow back'.
will said,
July 21, 2016 @ 6:06 pm
Which, I realise, isn't a pun, but shows similar humour (and a good attitude to life and risk and following your whim regardless of what other people think)
MikeA said,
July 21, 2016 @ 6:33 pm
Not the establishment name, but on a few hair salons I have seen "Walkens Welcome" (with a picture of Christopher). One of these, in Vancouver B.C. added "Cash only" with a picture of Johnny. So I suspect word-play may come with the the hairytory.
Chris said,
July 21, 2016 @ 7:45 pm
When I lived in New Haven, there was a place I drove by sometimes called Flava In Ya Hair!. I didn't get the joke until years later. Looks like there is also a shop in Philadelphia with that name.
As a kid I used to get my hair cut at the Village Clip Joint, which is already (more or less) on your list.
Mike said,
July 21, 2016 @ 8:37 pm
Hairroin, in Los Angeles. And as far as cutesy names for law practices, there's The Legal Grind (combination law office / coffee house) in Santa Monica. A cutesy name for a cutesy concept, but a cheap place to get a will drawn up.
Rubrick said,
July 21, 2016 @ 8:41 pm
A nice one I saw in (I think) Boulder, CO years ago was Hannah and Her Scissors
Michael Watts said,
July 21, 2016 @ 8:41 pm
I can't make any sense of this as marketing. Is the idea that patronizing the shop is similar to killing yourself?
John Finkbiner said,
July 21, 2016 @ 8:50 pm
Their was a place called "Lock Smith" (I think; it might have been one word) on south street in Philly in the late '90s. Google tells me their is a "Locksmith Hair Studio" in Cleveland.
Jim said,
July 21, 2016 @ 8:57 pm
There are a few other industries that do this, too:
Thai restaurants (Thai Tanic, Thai Me Up, Thai Foon)
Coffee shops (Brew Skies, Morning Grind)
Neil Weinreb said,
July 21, 2016 @ 10:33 pm
One place I lived had a Hair It Is, but the letters were too close together and all caps so it read HAIRITIS. Not good because who wants inflammation of the hair?
AntC said,
July 21, 2016 @ 11:01 pm
Hack'n'Dye on the corner of Hackthorne Road/Dyers Pass
Clipjoint
Rebecca said,
July 21, 2016 @ 11:01 pm
In my town:
Hair to Stay
WedLocks Bridal Hair
Bull Locks Hair (?!)
Roscoe said,
July 21, 2016 @ 11:40 pm
Cutting Edge
John Swindle said,
July 22, 2016 @ 12:06 am
I'm still mentally stuck at Mel's Barber (in Kaimuki, Honolulu, although I've never gone in). Who is Mel's barber? Why don't we say "Mel's Grocer" or "Mel's Pharmacist" or "Mel's Restaurateur"? Why aren't their clinics called "Mel's Doctor" or "Judy's Chiropractor"?
Lauren said,
July 22, 2016 @ 12:10 am
I used to walk past The Bald And The Beautiful in Carlton North (Melbourne, Australia) and giggle.
Yuval said,
July 22, 2016 @ 12:47 am
None in Q, though.
Mateusz said,
July 22, 2016 @ 12:58 am
The funniest one I've seen is in Gdynia, Poland: "Fale, loki, koki"
Using the word "fabryka" – factory is quite common in Poland as in "Fabryka fryzur" (haircut factory) or "Fabryka stylu" (style factory).
Another common pattern is using the proprietor's name so you get quite a log of joints called "Dorota", "Ania", "Kasia", "Magda" etc
Barrie England said,
July 22, 2016 @ 1:54 am
Fish and chip shops also go in for this sort of thing:
https://www.buzzfeed.com/patricksmith/lets-go-fishcotheque?utm_term=.nfeQEepMP#.xsQG5kJm4
Lugubert said,
July 22, 2016 @ 2:33 am
My Swedish hairdresser is Harvard.
Not funny?
Hårvård means hair care…
David Morris said,
July 22, 2016 @ 2:57 am
In Korea, I have seen several hairdressers called (in English) '(name's) Hear Salon)', which is not a cutesy name, but a misspelling.
Christian Saunders said,
July 22, 2016 @ 3:24 am
My friends have a chain of wine bars/shops in London called 'Planet of the Grapes'.
cM said,
July 22, 2016 @ 3:41 am
Michael Watts:
Beats me. I guess it's "pun before sense".
I'm not sure how well all this actually works, marketing-wise. Have you ever heard someone mentioning the punny name of the place where they got their last haircut?
mollymooly said,
July 22, 2016 @ 6:39 am
Florists are another common case, typically "Blooming ".
There's "Knobs and Knockers" in Dublin.
mollymooly said,
July 22, 2016 @ 6:40 am
…typically "Blooming adjective" I meant
Ralph Hickok said,
July 22, 2016 @ 7:52 am
There's one near my home called "The Cutting Zone," which strikes me as a terrible name because it brings to mind "the killing zone."
S. Norman said,
July 22, 2016 @ 8:03 am
In Sayville(Long Island) we had The Barber of Sayville
Sniffnoy said,
July 22, 2016 @ 8:55 am
I once saw one called "I'll Cut You" in Chicago.
Robert said,
July 22, 2016 @ 10:41 am
Scissors Palace
Matt McIrvin said,
July 22, 2016 @ 11:11 am
There was a local salon called "Hair It Is" where I grew up, and I always read it as "Hairitis".
Matt McIrvin said,
July 22, 2016 @ 11:12 am
…just like Neil Weinreb, I see!
J.W. Brewer said,
July 22, 2016 @ 12:21 pm
The Simpsons' Harry Shearers reference reminded me that there is one in my town (presumably aimed at Beatles fans, who may be an aging cohort of potential customers) named "Billy Shears." Whether any of the people now or formerly involved in its management were named Billy is unknown tome.
Felicity O'Meara said,
July 22, 2016 @ 12:57 pm
I get my hair cut at Bangs & Locks in Oakland.
Two names I recall from Chicago: Raun's Hair-Em, and Sheers & Cheers.
John Swindle said,
July 22, 2016 @ 1:28 pm
For "aren't their" please read "aren't there."
Chris (different Chris) said,
July 22, 2016 @ 2:31 pm
@Mollymooly: in the Boston area, the florist "KaBloom!"
Robert Coren said,
July 22, 2016 @ 2:59 pm
you don't find law practices called Law 'n' Order to Go
I guess the fictional Dewey, Cheatem, and Howe, from the Boston-area radio show "Car Talk", doesn't count.
[(myl) The Car Talk website spells the second name "Cheetham". I always thought it should be "Cheatham", but both versions seem to be Out There, whereas I think that "Cheatem" exists only as an OCR error…]
PS said,
July 22, 2016 @ 3:27 pm
This is not quite the same thing, but a bilingual pun about barbers used to be reasonably popular in parts of Uttar Pradesh, India about a decade and a half ago (perhaps it still is).
It was not uncommon in those days to find itinerant barbers in rural areas of UP who carried their kits around in a box, and would "help" their customers wherever they found them. Some of these barbers also included a brick (ईट /iːʈ/ in Hindi) in their kits, which they would offer to their customers to sit upon (it not being guaranteed that a chair would be in ready supply were the customer to be found working in a field, for example).
This latter kind of considerate brick-carrying barber was lovingly referred to as an Italian barber.
David Gorsline said,
July 22, 2016 @ 6:09 pm
Just to throw one more name on the fire: my regular salon is called The Mane Event.
Chris Waigl said,
July 22, 2016 @ 6:15 pm
We have Shear Pleasure locally (in and around Fairbanks, AK). The one I go to is called Team Cutters, but I don't think that's overly punny. A few have mostly odd spelling (Kreativ Kutz, Hot Headz).
What's really really punny here is food truck/hut names. They have multiplied, to general approval, over the last years. Smash Burgers. The Bun on the Run (one of the oldest, and there's a cookbook available). Zorba on the Run (much later than the Bun… and offering gyros). Between the Buns. The Arctic Daily Grind (coffee). Frostbite Foods.
Christopher Henrich said,
July 22, 2016 @ 8:58 pm
Pet groomers are another group that see to go in for humorous names. I particularly remember "Glad Wags."
Fcb said,
July 22, 2016 @ 9:55 pm
Here in this small SoCal city we can boast "The Best Little Hairhouse In Texas" right next dor to "Get Nailed".
Mark Johnson said,
July 23, 2016 @ 2:37 am
On my way to work I pass
linquist hair
in Lindfield (a northern Sydney suburb)
Killer said,
July 23, 2016 @ 3:17 am
In San Francisco, there's Every Six Weeks.
Bob Ladd said,
July 23, 2016 @ 4:14 am
@ Robert Coren
The UK satirical magazine Private Eye regularly refers to the fictitious law firm of Messrs. Sue, Grabbit & Runne.
Anthea Fleming said,
July 23, 2016 @ 5:39 am
Years ago I used to drive past two adjacent shops whose names amused me. They were Master of the Waves and In the Curl. In the Curl sold surfboards. Master of the Waves was a hair-dresser's salon. i often thought they could have swapped names. This was in Nunawading, Victoria, Australia.
Killer said,
July 23, 2016 @ 10:56 am
I'm surprised there isn't more discussion of punning coffee-shop names. This article has a list of a hundred or so: http://www.atlasobscura.com/articles/the-names-of-americas-coffee-shops-cover-all-the-grounds
From the article:
A blend of coffeeshop facts:
—38 variations on grind/grounds
—27 variations on "brews"
—14 variations on "bean"
—11 variations on "perk"
—15 shops named "Brewed Awakening"
Editor's Picks:
Burial Grounds (Olympia, WA)
Coffee Crossing (New Albany, IN)
Freudian Sip (Northridge, CA)
Rimsky-Korsakoffee House (Portland, OR)
Scone Pony (Spring Lake NJ)
Sister Sludge (Minneapolis, MN)
Charles Antaki said,
July 23, 2016 @ 1:24 pm
As a a variation on punning – there's a hairdresser in my home town whose name (Amnesia) is a bit odd for the service it offers. I guess it's a sort-of pun to the effect that "nobody can ever remember what we're called", but that's asking for a lot of thinking-through from passing shoppers. But it's still going, so maybe oddity is enough.
Buttermilk Sky said,
July 23, 2016 @ 3:18 pm
New York has Curl Up & Dye
Thor said,
July 24, 2016 @ 5:15 am
My hairdresser here in Reykjavik is Hárlínan [= Hairline]
In Edinburgh there is a chippy called "The piece of cod", obviously from the Anglican dismissal blessing.
Robert Coren said,
July 24, 2016 @ 9:50 am
@Killer: There used to be a coffee house in Cambridge, MA, called Common Grounds.
Florence Artur said,
July 24, 2016 @ 1:43 pm
Never thought about this before, but it's definitely a thing in France too, as mentioned already. There is a salon next to my home called Syn Hair'gie. I'd say that hair salons fall into three categories: franchises, which usually bear the name of the founder (well, some name that sounds like a real person's, anyway); independent stores with the owner's first name (or some female first name anyway), and a name with a pun on hair or tif (slang for hair).
MCO said,
July 24, 2016 @ 6:26 pm
My favorite was the (now closed) Alexander Pope Salon in Oakland.
crispybacon said,
July 24, 2016 @ 6:36 pm
Late to the party here, as always, but there's a Curly Temple in Geraldine, New Zealand. Or at least there used to be.
Florence Artur:
Franglais names with apostrophes in are a topic in themselves.
Florence Artur said,
July 25, 2016 @ 1:15 pm
@crispybacon Ah yes, the apostrophe!
BZ said,
July 25, 2016 @ 2:54 pm
Cute puns are common in the computing industry. From command names (woman is a better version of man, less is a better version of more) to OS names (if you've got a MULTICS you'll have a UNIX) to programming languages. You have forced acronyms like BASIC, programmer jargon jokes like C++, music jokes like C#
etv13 said,
July 25, 2016 @ 7:17 pm
When I lived on the East Coast, I got my hair cut at The Last Tangle in Washington.
Sean Purdy said,
July 26, 2016 @ 8:19 am
After many years of being the butt of predictable, post-haircut "shorn Sean" jokes, I finally turned the tables by visiting a Marylebone barbers called "Shorn by Shaun".
I was of course "Shorn Sean, shorn by Shaun at Shorn by Shaun".
I never went back. It was a bloody awful haircut.
P said,
July 26, 2016 @ 7:16 pm
League of Barbers
/df said,
July 27, 2016 @ 9:18 am
Mane Line used to be in Duke St London W1
Making Waves in London SW13
Barnet Fair (for the connoisseurs of rhyming slang, but not the name of the salon in Barnet, N London, that I once used)
Head Masters
Also, consider the pet services industry. I know of Houndstretchers (dog-walking), For the Love of Dog (grooming).
Kenny Easwaran said,
July 28, 2016 @ 2:43 am
I was also going to mention coffee shops (the number of different types of Grounds in Berkeley was pretty amazing), but I suspect the Atlas Obscura link above settles that.
And there's Sweeney Todd's barber shop in Los Angeles – not exactly a pun.
Jeff B. said,
July 28, 2016 @ 4:37 am
Hair Today, Gone Tomorrow
Fred said,
July 29, 2016 @ 7:41 am
A Shear Thing
Heavenly Headz
Larry's Hairy Business
Maria's Cut and Dryed
Shear Sherrie
Sizzor Shak
Salon O'hair
Hair Quarters
Curl Up & Dye
Upper Cut
Fred said,
July 29, 2016 @ 7:46 am
We also have a rental place in town called Burt's Rentals. Took me entirely too long to realize the reference.
tedpamulang said,
July 31, 2016 @ 5:37 am
In South Jakarta: Herr Katz
Bîp said,
August 1, 2016 @ 3:51 pm
A Danish one: de 4 hårtider "the four hairtimes", a pun on de 4 årtider "the four seasons ('year-times')".